-Watch the Amazing Kimmer Spin Another Tale-

Translation Software Available for Converting Kimmer Speak to Their True Meaning-

I was on the LCF last night when someone posted a quote from Kimmer from the Kimkins website. The post was regarding the recent rating of Kimkins at the BBB and the negative reviews.

This post of Kimmer’s really is so obtuse and obvious in how she spins things that I had to wonder why my Microsoft office did not have a Kimmer speak translation function. They say necessity is the mother of invention……..

So I would like to offer a software package that includes the translation of Kimmer speak to the truth. I have not set up my website yet but I am thinking it will be something along the lines of www.Icall-Bs.com and of course the price will be $60.00. I hate to even charge a fee but all of the proceeds will go to help feed the family of ants that seemed to have moved into my kitchen.

To demonstrate the effectiveness of this product here is a sample of my recent translation of Kimmer’s BBB post-

This was Kimmer’s comment on the BBB subject:
“Re:* BBB Reviews* 2 Hours, 48 Minutes ago
The BBB is a private company with no official or government ties. When the anti-Kimmer first started their BBB crusade (yes, they DO seem to have a lot of extra time on their hands), we replied.However, the BBB continues to allow “reviews” by non-members or “who have heard … blah, blah, blah” which is a farce. After providing documentation that at least 4 “complaints” were from fictional fakes who never purchased a membership, the BBB ignored the proof and we have stopped responding.However, the BBB was very anxious to sell us an annual membership at $400/year”

Kimmer speak translation-

There are just too many negative reviews being placed on the BBB and I am not able to get enough positive reviews done all by myself. Even when I use all my various identities and personalities I am not able to get that @#$# rating to go up! Therefore, I will attempt to discredit the very agency that I was attempting to use for validation when I set Kimkins up with the BBB just a short time ago. I will state a known fact that they are not official or tied to the government in such a way in hopes of taking away their credibility. Then I will take a jab at those giving negative reviews by implying they are lazy with nothing better to do then write negative comments. I will then discredit their reviews by saying they were never Kimkins members in the first place.
Oh and the final blow to the BBB reviews will be the hint that the BBB themselves can be bought out with just a $400 bribe!!!

DID I GET THAT RIGHT KIMMER OR DO I NEED TO UPDATE MY SOFTWARE???

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4 Responses

  1. Hi, Honeybee!

    Well, your comment about Captain Morgan in your post on my blog (Medusa) broke me up. Thanks for the laugh!

    Sorry about the bad link to your blog. I checked Technorati and at the end of your blog’s URL in my favourites, there was a bunch of gobbledygook. I don’t know what happened when I saved your URL, but I fixed it and it’s working now.

    Hmmmm, maybe Kimmer figured out my password on Technorati and is messing with my URLs. Bad Kimmer.

    Love your blog. Keep doing what you’re doing.

    All the best,
    Medusa

  2. I love that translation!
    Got around to update my blog list; ended up here when I checked the link. It works 🙂

  3. ROTFLMAO! Oh the translation thing is so funny!!!!! I’m so thankful for good people with a sense of humor!

  4. http://www.healthfraud.org/ca/ can’t PM you on LCFs but read your post about sending copies of the article to places and thought you might have missed this one if you are moderating the comments you don’t need to approve this one just get the link 🙂

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